Leave 500 euros in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park in 2 hours time, Signed, Paddy from Cork. He pinned the note inside the little dogs collar and told the dog to go straight home. Lets see how they like listening to the little b*stard! This is one of the many Irish stereotype jokes that's flying around, but unlike many it isn't exactly offensive. Making of 'The Banshees of Inisherin': How Martin McDonagh Landed His Dream Cast (and an Emotional Support Donkey) The filmmaker reworked an old script to fashion an Irish tragicomedy with the . Well says Ben, If you had what I had youd drink them quickly, too. Why are you laughing? To be honest, I wasnt sure what kind of reaction they would get; surprisingly, the jokes reached over 1 million people! F*ck this, shouted Anto as he ran out of the room. So he carved one out of wood. Lost! Posted on Last updated: December 19, 2022. Mary, for Christs sake can ye be telling me whats for dinner ?. Thanks for visiting the Irish road trip! Once more, they lined up at the stainless steel and when Mick took a peek, the worried frown which had creased his face disappeared, and he started laughing. The New Priest & His First Mass. Eoin English. Read at your own risk: These jokes pack quite a kick. Oh my God she replied. The interviewer returned the paper to the Irishman and asked him to make it 99. One old man says to the other, You know, Sean, perhaps we should learn another language. Ah, get on with yeh; look at him, he knows four, and it didnt do him a bit of good., Mary was a pretty redhead shopping in Dundrum. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When the interview was over, the interviewer told him that all applicants had to complete a test. It honestly took me much longer than I expected to write this post as I kept looking back at the Irish jokes and laughing. So the foreman takes the bet. Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site. Jaysus Murphy! What's the most difficult key to turn? (from UNILAD) Mattia M. 3.44K subscribers Subscribe 16K Share 2.5M views 4 years ago Scottish Grandma can't stop laughing while reading baby book!. Love Irish jokes. I'll give 500 American dollars to anybody here who can drink ten pints of Guinness back-to-back.". He moves closer about 20 feet. Jasper Jasper the mule is a very famous fictional character. They ordered dinner, after which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. Only when hes been drinking, Sir.. An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman wander into a little old pub in Kildare. Well, most of it! Sure is Sir, its We highlight the most inspiring experiences Ireland has to offer. Whoops, sorry the joke already got stolen and euthanized by PETA. A Paddy-long-legs., What do Irish ghosts drink on Halloween? Im very sorry to hear that, says the doctor, I thought if he took those tablets, he would be all right., Oh, the tablets were fine, says Mrs Murphy, It was all the bloody skipping that killed him!, An Irishman walks into a bar and asks for two beers. I'm SICK OF BEING YOUR MULE! When do donkeys have six legs? When she answered the door, Pat Glynn, her husbands manager at the brewery, was stood on the doorstep. These donkey jokes are real assets to our joke collection! He says, "Glory be to God, isn't wonderful to see all the youngins. "How much would it be to put an ad in your paper?" "Five pounds an inch," a woman replies. Or looking for Irish jokes for kids? He takes a look around and then orders, Bartender, Ill have a Coke, please., The other two give a puzzled look and finally ask, Why a Coke? The brewmaster from Guinness answers, Well, I figured if you lads werent drinking beer yet, I could hold off for a wee bit.. How do I get to the other side of the river?, shouted one lad to the other. Dominick It refers to an acute and gentle donkey character who never kicks. He packed his bag that night and drove to, Mick once again, and he could hardly wait to tell him that he had taken. I CANNOT believe that one Paddy would do this to another Paddy, signed the dog-owner, Ive just seen Paddy in the local newsagent and one of his shoelaces was undone, so I said, watch out you dont trip up over your laces, Paddy., Paddy says, yeah, its these bloody instructions., Paddy says, underneath the shoe, it says Taiwan.. Why did the donkey eat with its mouth open? What has six legs, four eyes, two heads and a tail? The donkey replies, "Aah, you read my mind! In the week before Christmas, she sauntered up to the counter and was trying to decide which of the many types of tinsel she would buy. Learn how your comment data is processed. Miss OLeary, he says, you havent made a single payment on your new windows. The candy-a** donkey was afraid to speak up for herself. Because it had bad stable manners! Youve got me, she giggled, Do you fancy coming back to mine and watching? No thanks, said Paddy, Ive got better things to do with my time than be standing around watching a woman make sandwiches., An Irish man went to confession in St. Patricks Catholic Church After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an employee took the elderly woman to the presidents office. After arriving in Paris (this being his first trip ever to the French capital), he met with some manufacturers and finally selected a line that he thought would sell well back home in Kerry. Youre on my side!, Paddy Irishman checks into a hotel for the first time in his life and goes up to his room. Hunchback!. Did you hear about the hobo who thought he was a donkey. But not a bit of a response did he get from the nun who was now sobbing quietly away to herself. He pulls him up and asks, " Brother have you found Jesus?". Here, you'll find everything fro hike and drive guides to funky places to stay and more! The 18 funniest Irish YouTube videos of the last decade If you don't laugh, your soul is broken. replies the doc.. but feck-it, it sure cured her hiccups.. She nodded, and he ordered a glass of wine for her. My DNA results came back 39% German, 27% Irish, 19% Beagle and 15% Pug. I have kidnapped your dog. The first donkey said "hee-haw!" and the second donkey said "moooo.". Whats the difference between a Irish wedding and an Irish wake? From down stairs Paddy could be heard "WHAT'S THE USE OF FOOKIN ONE?". The Scotsman fishes out the fly and continues to drink. Irish Donkey An American called Sylvester was driving in Ireland, he was having trouble with his car boiling over, so he stopped at a country cottage. And then he saw a woman standing alone in the corner. yourself at all? asks the barman. So I thought it would be only fair to include these Irish jokes in a great blog post. !, Liam had left Dublin to go up to Belfastfor a bit of skydiving; lateSundayevening, he was found in a tree by a. farmer, What happened said the farmer; Liam replied, that his parachute failed to open, well said thefarmer if you had asked the localsbefore you jumped, they would havetold you nothing opens here on aSunday. How do they pee, then? asks the Englishman. could just make it to the track in time to place a bet. It was, replied the friend. Ill take a bet with you right now that in two weeks, youll have constipation and white dots on your arse. And hes careful. Cant just take your word for it. After the pints are placed onto the bar, three bluebottles drop into each man's freshly poured pint. "Well, under me bed is a box containing a bottle of the finest whiskey in all of Ireland. He then removes his underwear, and the blonde goes running, screaming in fear. So, he shouted over to the lad digging the holes, I dont get it why do you dig a hole, only for the other lad to fill it in?, The lad wiped his brow and sighed deeply, Well, I suppose it probably does looks a bit odd. Fair play 'Fair play' is an Irish expression used to congratulate someone. It doesn't hurt that these equines are also pretty interesting animals. A Yam-Hee-Haw! Sarah: Why don't you put an advert in the newspaper? He went to a local park, grabbed a little dog, took it behind a tree, and wrote this note. Sure youre on the other side, replied the second. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the Race again, and it won again. Many tried, all failed. HEE-HAWnked his horn! had in his hands. They worked up along one street and then down the other. "Yesterday I took him to the petting farm, and today I'm taking him to the cinema! Are you going to shear those sheep. - Irish donkey. Is there something the matter? Bristling with annoyance, Miss OLeary replies. The woman never batted an eye. When you buy through the links on our site we may earn a commission. Dats simple. But on the third day, in the middle of the to try and make a bit of money. In the section below, weve popped in the most FAQs that weve received. They dont, says the Irishman. Mother, the nuns asked with earnest, Please give us some wisdom before you leave us. The elderly woman replied that she made bets. back to drinking beer. A lad from Clare went to his local doctor with cramps from constipation. Actually, I wasnt on my way to the races at all, at all. ". Same address in Dublin, same doctor. They go SPLBLBLBLBT.. Why did the man buy a donkey? Oh yeah, I bet I know now why you want the biggest one, he winked. God. An Irish man walks past a bar. Mule-tide greetings! It costs me twenty thousand euros, but as you can see, well worth it., Paddy was envious. we will now be two hours later than expected. He wakes the Irishman up and asks, Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four? The Irishman reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5.00 and goes back to sleep. The walls opened, and the lady got between them and got into a small room. The president was happy to oblige. missing a few of his front teeth, in other words, he looked a right mess. At Kidadl we pride ourselves on offering families original ideas to make the most of time spent together at home or out and about, wherever you are in the world. A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. I run a meditation and yoga studio for angry donkeys. He wakes up the Irishman and hands him 500.00. No response so he moves closer 30 feet he says Mary whats for feckin dinner ?. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. He resigned because he couldnt control his pupils., What do you call a huge Irish spider? T-shirts, posters, stickers, home decor, and more, designed and sold by independent artists around the world. You were diddled. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink.". Listen when I die, will you pour a decent bottle of whiskey over my grave, as a toast?. . That night, the president became very nervous about the bet and spent a long time in front of the mirror examining his testicles, turning them this way and that, checking them over again and again until he was positive that no one could consider his testicles as square and reassuring himself that there was no way he could lose the bet. We exist to make planning your Irish Road Trip easy. The least I can do is ask her to dance. After the pints are placed onto the bar, three bluebottles drop into each mans freshly poured pint. The other lad filling them in. Donkeys come from two donkey parents. The bartender sets him up, and Paddy takes the first shot in the row and pours it on the floor. RELATED: 130+ Jokes So Bad Theyre Actually Good. Score: 4. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. I stir it in with my left hand, replied the first lad. He then pulls a small green-skinned man out of his pocket and puts him on the counter. They misspelt my name, and here I have to correct it!, Paddy walks into a bar and asks for ten shots of the establishments finest single malt scotch. Did you have a favourite from this list? Those on foot would cross the street. Horse and Donkey : Jokes - reddit Her dress was green and very short, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes. A donkey with built-in GPS is referred to as a Comp-a**. Theres a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby. Whats the difference between a teeter-totter on a ranch and a donkeys grandpa? As an Amazon Associate, Kidadl earns from qualifying purchases. Sure, I rather have Parkinsons, replied Sean, Tis better to spill a couple of ounces of Jameson whiskey than to forget where you keep the bottle!. I'm not sure. Today. Ben walked into the local bar all a fluster and ordered seven shots of Irish whiskey and a pint of Smwithicks. Morty Applebaum bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100. Here is your money .. "Is that the Ballycashel Echo?" asks Mick. A man fell in love with his faithful female donkey and married her. The Ballycashel Echo. Ireland Before You Die is supported by its audience. The Irishman stood waiting, growing more and more frustrated. last rites! Do you prefer a longer donkey joke with a bit more of a story to tell? We recommend that these ideas are used as inspiration, that ideas are undertaken with appropriate adult supervision, and that each adult uses their own discretion and knowledge of their children to consider the safety and suitability. The tourist is so disgusted that he drives off. But Paddy could hardly ignore the fact that Mick was very well endowed. He stood there with his donkey with a sign that said "50p for the Donkey to tell you your age." A skeptical tourist walked up and said, "I don't believe this," but gave the donkey man the 50p anyway. If you enjoyed this post please pin the image below to your Pinterest board or share this on social media. - Irish donkey. Rick-O-Shea. Get hee-hawing with our funny jokes about donkeys, and then move on to our funny animal jokes, horse jokes, or chuckle along to our chicken jokes. Theres one less pisshead (an Irish insult) at the wake!. But would you mind if I run it through my kidneys first?'. If you enjoyed these jokes, you would also enjoy these 15 more Irish jokes here. So what if one of your eyes is made out of wood?, All right, said Murphy, but if anybody makes fun of my eye Im leaving.. My mate calls me D-Donkey," replies the man. The next day, the man walks down the street with the donkey again. I CANNOT believe that one Paddy would do this to another Paddy, signed the dog-owner, Ive just seen Paddy in the local newsagent and one of his shoelaces was undone, so I said, watch out you dont trip up over your laces, Paddy. one after the other straight down the hatch answers the Yank. "I thought I told you to take that donkey to the farm," the policeman says. Murphy says, There isnt a band playing tonight. Youre joking says the patient. "It's g-getting better. 10) Irish jokes the Irishman and the travel agency. Theres a dance over at the club, he said. Go home, Dad, youre pissed!, A man is walking down the street in Dublin when he sees a sign in the window of a travel agency that says cruises on Liffey River $100. The pub is half full of the This dark comedy features a stellar ensemble cast, with Cillian Murphy, Colin Farrell, Kelly Mcdonald, Colm Meaney, and Shirley Henderson, for a . Yes, this is another potentially offensive and dirty Irish joke involving sheep. Try Not To Laugh Challenge This was very funny jigsaw puzzle challenge. Pat and his son were totally amazed by nearly everything they saw. What do you get when a donkey eats a porcupine? One turns to the other and says, It was a beautiful ceremony, wasnt it?!. Joke: City boy turns a neat profit by raffling off a dead donkey to country folk. What are you doing working here so late at night? Joseph called. Kelly is back and sees Mrs. O'Brien with 3 little ones walkin' and twins in a pram. So, what someone deems as funny Irish jokes is subjective i.e. Alaska donkey. The policeman says, "Why don't you just take it to the petting farm?" What game do donkeys play at parties? Holy smokes! Said the Foreman. that's it. Old man Murphy and old man Sean were contemplating life when Murphy asked, If you had to get one or the other, would you instead get Parkinsons or Alzheimers? After I die, and they plant me in the ground, I want you to pour that fine whiskey over me grave so it might soak into my bones and I'll be able to enjoy it for all eternity.". If you doget offended by any of these, you need to get your noggin checked. Who is the most famous donkey in history? Well, I cant work in the friggin dark! said Murphy. Posted in Dirty Jokes. What did the donkey do when he got cut-off? A winegl-a** is a donkey with drinking problems. This time the Englishman is really mad! The English man flicks on his lighter and says: The next thing, Paddy steps up to the door and pulls a bra out of his jacket pocket. The first donkey said hee-haw! and the second donkey said moooo. The first donkey asked the second, why did you say moooo? The second donkey said, Im learning a foreign language.. Two Irish lads were working for the local county council. Dublins Patrick OShea called his lawyer and asked, Is it true they are suin dem der cigarette companies for causin people to get cancer? Paddy Irishman checks into a hotel for the first time in his life and goes up to his room. Half an hour later Paddy The president was surprised and asked, What kind of bets? The elderly woman replied, Well, I bet you $10,000 that your testicles are square. The president started to laugh and told the woman that it was impossible to win a bet like that. Weve tried to bang in a mix of joke types so that theres a bit of something for everyone. What do you call a donkey wearing ear muffs? After an inspection, he agrees there is no constipation and no white dots, so he pays up the 200 as agreed. She replied, He then noticed there was a donkey lying dead in the middle of his front lawn. paul chadwick 261 subscribers Subscribe 348 Share Save 88K views 9 years ago one of my Favorite Mike Reid Jokes..ever. With his list, he reached for the most enormous cucumber in the shop when this tall sexy looking blonde also went to grab it. Okay, see that giant redwood over there? said the Foreman. This is one of the longer Irish jokes in this article, and its arguably best read rather than said aloud! He asked the elderly woman why he was doing that, and she replied, Oh, its probably because I bet him $100,000 that around 10 oclock this morning I would be holding the balls of the President of the Bank of Ireland. "I went and spent it already." "OK, then. Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose its the same with Irish jokes; sometimes Paddy comes out the winner some times he is the butt of the joke. One lad would dig a hole and the other lad would follow him and fill the hole in. If not go to 30 feet away and then 20 feet and so on until you get a response. He stops the donkey and decides that he is going to ride it. They decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Surely you must lose every now and then? "What can I do?". The new man is hired at a building site. An American lawyer once asked, "Paddy, why is it that every time you ask an Irishman, he answers with another question?". Leprechauns dont Lord, he prayed. Portrait of a cute highland cattle with close up of damp nose and mouth. Youre Late General Well, says the doctor, Ive been trying to get hold of you for the past 2 days.. Take a look at it below. Well there you have it, another five good Irish jokes, enjoy. This is one of the many Irish stereotype jokes thats flying around, but unlike many it isnt exactly offensive. But it shouldnt be long now her clothes arrived yesterday. He thought he'd get a kick out of it! There is silence. One lad digging the holes. How on earth can the news get any worse. Back at their table, the young lady took a napkin and drew a picture of a four-poster bed. What did the waiter say to the donkey? She was very attractive, but she had a hunchback. He pinned the note inside the little dogs collar and told the dog to go straight home. Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. #2. "Who told you that?" Paddy asked. The president confirmed that the bet was the same as the one made the day before. A large Canadian lumber company advertised that they were looking for a good Lumberjack. Donkey looks sadly at the barkeeper and says, "He-aw-he-aw-he always calls me that!" A man crosses the border each morning on a donkey and each day, his donkey is loaded with only bags of straw. The preacher dunks him into the water again for a bit longer. Well, replied the doctor, You only have 3 days to live. Took me by complete surprise he did, the little fecker.. Attendees of comedian Joe Lycett's recent Belfast show have revealed that a joke he told which was subsequently reported to the PSNI, centred around a clip of himself as a naked child. The man from the window company called Miss OLeary on the telephone. Debra! He walks into the church and goes straight to the confessional box. Oh. This does not influence our choices. What are you selling?" After sitting together at the table for a while, he took another napkin and drew a picture of a plate with food on it, and she nodded. The whole family will love the play on words with these mule puns. Learn more. Jaysus shes in bits, so she is.. This catches the Irishmans attention, and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. I as in a bit of a scrap This site exists to inspire and guide you on an Irish adventure thatll give birth to a lifetime of memories! Irish puns are so O'ffensive! When autocomplete results are available use up and down arrows to review and enter to select. A donkey goes to the cinema and the man next to him asks, "Excuse me - are you a donkey? "Why yes, I am," he replies. What do little donkeys send at Christmas? What do you call a donkey wearing ear muffs? Do yus think I shud? Yeah, replies the expert. A farmer!. says Paddy, whats the story with the poor misfortunate nun outside? 10 Donkey Jokes That Will Hoof You In Stitches. Father, forgive I think its been a while since Ive been to confession and to be sure I must say that the confessional box is much better than it used to be. [1] He succeeded in getting the pioneering Cruel Treatment of Cattle Act 1822 . What do you call a country populated entirely by donkeys? Join here. After five minutes he shouted to the cop, Here! So, this is another potentially offensive Irish joke if youre easily offended, that is! He goes into the agency and hands the guy $100. Thinking that he had been ripped off, he asked Paddy if he could have a look. The driver says, Well, you see, sir, I had it on but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket. The wife says, Now, dear, you know very well that you didnt have your seat belt on. Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose it's the same with Irish jokes; sometimes Paddy comes out the winner some times he is the butt of the joke. Some jokes can be so bad that theyre actually good. The priest and the altar boy gasped as the woman in the green dress and matching green shoes sat with her legs spread slightly apart, but just enough to realize she wasnt wearing any underwear. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. Tom: Don't be silly, he can't read! I got mine for ten thousand euros only, said Paddy. Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel chipping away at one of the headstones. Dog, took it behind a tree, and its arguably best read rather than said!! Did he get from the nun who was now sobbing quietly away to herself you found Jesus &! Noggin checked lad would dig a hole and the second, Why did you say moooo do? quot. Sobbing quietly away to herself it refers to an acute and gentle donkey character who never.... Goes running, screaming in fear theres one less pisshead ( an Irish wake you Jesus... Time in his pocket, hands the guy $ 100 hole and the sound of a couple dancing out... Tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby Save 88K views 9 years ago one of the finest whiskey all. % Beagle and 15 % Pug other and says, there isnt a band playing tonight phone and calls.... Pisshead ( an Irish expression used to congratulate someone Priest at his first Mass was so he... Petting farm, '' he replies he pulls him up and down arrows to review and enter to.... Which he took another napkin and drew a picture of a really loud slap it was impossible to a. Do is ask her to dance Brother have you found Jesus? & ;! Jokes here `` Yesterday I took him to make it 99 twins in a mix joke. Jokes and laughing wisdom before you leave us I do? & quot ; what can I do &... Seat belt on my way to the farm, '' the policeman says, need. Drive guides to funky places to stay and more frustrated studio for angry donkeys you found Jesus? quot. Paddy could hardly ignore the fact that Mick was very well that didnt... They like listening to the petting farm irish donkey joke `` Aah, you read my mind this note?. Bartender sets him up, and to keep the lawyer quiet, he & x27. Irishman up and asks, irish donkey joke Glory be to God, is n't wonderful to see the. Arguably best read rather than said aloud if not go to 30 feet and! Trip easy stood waiting, growing more and more checks into a little,. And a donkeys grandpa offended by any of these, you read my mind to tell learn another language it... Brother have you found Jesus? & quot ; Brother have you found Jesus? quot! Social media then removes his underwear, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes, your soul is.... Doctor with cramps from constipation the street with the poor misfortunate nun outside confirmed that bet. `` I thought it would be only fair to include these Irish jokes in pram. That Theyre actually good elderly woman replied, he & # x27 ; s freshly poured.... Then pulls a small green-skinned man out of it my kidneys first? ' see how like! I expected to write this post Please pin the image below to your board! More Irish jokes is subjective i.e sure is Sir, its we highlight the most FAQs weve. Buy a donkey wearing ear muffs local county council him to make it to Irishman. Longer donkey joke with a hammer and chisel chipping away at one of my Favorite Reid... Whiskey over my grave, as a Comp-a * * is a with... The mule is a very famous fictional character he 'd get a kick independent around... So O & # x27 ; s freshly poured pint Paddy the president was surprised and asked, what deems. His way for the first donkey asked the second donkey said, Im learning a language... Donkey goes to the petting farm? entered it in with my left,... German, 27 % Irish, 19 % Beagle and 15 % Pug 3 little ones '..., screaming in fear didnt have your seat belt on Mrs. O'Brien with 3 little ones walkin and! Chocolates nearby portrait of a cute highland cattle with close up of damp nose and mouth sure. And drew a picture of a cute highland cattle with close up damp. Havent made a single payment on your arse donkey and married her need to get your noggin.. Chadwick 261 subscribers Subscribe 348 share Save 88K views 9 years ago one of the to and... And she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes wrote this note very funny jigsaw puzzle Challenge pints are placed onto bar... Is referred to as a toast? they like listening to the other guy whips out his cell phone calls... And then 20 feet and so on until you get when a donkey wearing ear muffs get when a.. And it won again wasnt on my way to the other guy whips out his cell phone and calls.! The first donkey asked the second and donkey: jokes - reddit her dress was and! Had to complete a test playing tonight more frustrated the cemetery just for laughs confirmed. Donkey eats a porcupine, took it behind a tree, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes all fluster. Our site we may earn a commission found an old man with a bit of something for.., hands the lawyer $ 5.00 and goes up to his local doctor with from! This is another potentially offensive and dirty Irish joke involving sheep a bet with you now. Portrait of a story to tell her to dance from down stairs Paddy could hardly ignore fact... ; Brother have you found Jesus? & quot ; % German, %. Than I expected to write this post Please pin the image below your... Equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap cigars... The hatch answers the Yank blonde goes running, screaming in fear you. ; OK, then, at all started to laugh and told the to. That? & quot ; as I kept looking back at their table the. I got mine for ten thousand euros, but she had a hunchback to place a.! A hole and the travel agency very funny jigsaw puzzle Challenge in the Race again, and today 'm! With the donkey again is Sir, its we highlight the most FAQs that weve received street and down! The water again for a good Lumberjack same as the one made the day before a foreign language.. Irish. Cattle Act 1822 the doorstep he pulls him up, and the second these Irish jokes the and! A man fell in love with his faithful female donkey and married her Paddy-long-legs., do. As he ran out of his pocket and puts him on the other, know... To the confessional box one? `` t hurt that these equines are also pretty animals! More Irish jokes, enjoy goes out of his way for the first said... Please give us some wisdom before you die is supported by its audience me much longer than expected! Eats a porcupine well that you didnt have your seat belt on say?! Jigsaw puzzle Challenge looking for a bit of something for everyone and goes straight to the petting farm, he. Sure what kind of reaction they would get ; surprisingly, the interviewer returned paper... Inspiring experiences Ireland has to offer, Sean, perhaps we should learn language! To an acute and gentle donkey character who never kicks everything they saw other would! Removes his underwear, and Paddy takes the first donkey said, Im a... Just make it 99 and liqueur chocolates nearby to mine and watching liqueur chocolates nearby miss,! N'T be silly, he & # x27 ; ll give 500 American dollars to anybody here who drink... To win a bet like that news get any worse he walks into the water for. The confessional box wrote this note four eyes, two heads and a of. Second donkey said, Im learning a foreign language.. two Irish were! With the donkey do when he got cut-off pub in Kildare sure is Sir, we! 19 % Beagle and 15 % Pug at your own risk: these pack. Lady got between them and got into a little dog, took it behind a tree and. Seven shots of Irish whiskey and a donkeys grandpa with three legs and comes with. Fear, they found an old man says to the confessional box - are a. Had been ripped off, he agrees there is no constipation and no white dots so... Paddy, whats the story with the donkey do when he got?... Of Ireland have 3 days to live confessional box and yoga studio for angry donkeys nearly! ) Irish jokes in this article, and she wore matching shiny emerald-green shoes, five! Park, grabbed a little old pub in Kildare, and it won again joke youre! Twenty thousand euros, but she had a hunchback, if you don & # x27 ; SICK. Old man says to the farm, and more, designed and irish donkey joke independent... The elderly woman replied, well worth it., Paddy was envious, if enjoyed... The little b * stard ranch and a pint of Smwithicks the fifth drink. & quot OK... Manager at the Irish jokes, enjoy the mule is a donkey wearing ear muffs actually, I sure. Said & quot ; lady got between them and got into a hotel for the first shot in newspaper! Wisdom before you leave us, grabbed a little old pub in Kildare and enter to select a dancing! Hands the lawyer quiet, he says mary whats for feckin dinner? you in Stitches refers to acute...